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Newcomer
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I hard theres a church called the devine proffit
church. Do you want too try that one.
 
Posts: 10 | Location: jacksonville | Registered: July 29, 2008Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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I have met several Pastors from Nigeria and Kenya
we forget here in the USA that there is a big world out there !
Where do you think missionaries from other countries go to evangelise ?
Many come here .
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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i dont have the name up yet but all you heathen will be welcome Wink
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Newcomer
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bIG O I WOULD LIKE TOO SEND YOU OVERSEAS.
 
Posts: 10 | Location: jacksonville | Registered: July 29, 2008Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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Thank You a man needs help going to places overseas!
go with me I will not let any snakes hurt you
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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well some of us have to work ,,so night nite
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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Grandpa & Grandpa ...

Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight.

When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills.

The son said, 'I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very strong and very expensive.'

'How much?' asked Grandpa.

'$10.00 a pill,' Answered the son.

'I don't care,' said Grandpa, 'I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow.'

Later the next morning, the son found $110.00 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said, 'I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00.

'I know,' said Grandpa. 'The hundred is from Grandma!'
 
Posts: 1195 | Location: home | Registered: May 20, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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*********important************

HOUSTON EVACUATION ROUTES

City officials just announced the Houston hurricane evacuation plan today:

Cajuns use I-10 East to Lafayette .

Hispanics use I-10 West to San Antonio .

Rednecks use 59 North to East Texas .

Republicans fly Continental first class to Washington DC .

Yankees use 45 South to Galveston . (very important)

Longhorns use 290 West to Austin .

Aggies use the 610 Loop.
 
Posts: 80 | Location: here Vs. there | Registered: August 22, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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Coming Election
------------------------------------------------

Honorable Secretary of Agriculture
Washington, D.C.

Dear Sir;

My friend, Ed Peterson, over at Rusk,Texas, received a check for $1,000 from the government for not raising hogs. So, I want to go into the "not raising hogs" business next year.

What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the best kind of farm not to raise hogs on, and what is the best breed of hogs not to raise? I want to be sure that I approach this endeavor in keeping with all governmental policies. I would prefer not to raise razorbacks, but if that is not a good breed not to raise, then I will just as gladly not raise Yorkshires or Durocs.

As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't raised.

My friend, Peterson, is very joyful about the future of the business. He has been raising hogs for twenty years or so, and the best he ever made on them was $422 in 1968, until this year when he got your check for $1000 for not raising hogs.

If I get $1000 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2000 for not raising 100 hogs? I plan to operate on a small scale at first, holding myself down to about 4000 hogs not raised, which will mean about $80,000 the first year. Then I can afford an airplane.

Now another thing, these hogs I will not raise will not eat 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also pay farmers for not raising corn and wheat. Will I qualify for payments for not raising wheat and corn not to feed the 4000 hogs I am not going to raise?

Also, I am considering the "not milking cows" business, so send me any information you have on that too.

In view of these circumstances, you understand that I will be totally unemployed and plan to file for unemployment and food stamps.

Be assured you will have my vote in the coming election.

Sincerely Yours,
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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Barbara Walters, from her time on Television's 20/20 years ago, did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands.

She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. From Ms.Walters' vantage point, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to walk even further back behind their husbands, and are happy to maintain the old custom.

Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, 'Why do you now seem happy with an old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?'

The woman looked Miss Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said, 'Land Mines.'

Moral of the story is (no matter what language you speak and where you go):

BEHIND EVERY MAN, THERE'S A SMART WOMAN
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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IDIOT SIGHTING::

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Rick the computer guy, to come over. Rick clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call. As he was walking away, I called after him,
"So, what was wrong?"
He replied,
"It was an ID ten T error."
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired:
"An ID ten T error?
What's that ... in case I need to fix it again?"
The computer guy grinned....
"Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"
"No," I replied.
"Write it down," he said, "
and I think you'll figure it out."
So I wrote out ...... I D 1 0 T
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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A Japanese doctor says, ‘Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in 6 weeks.’

A German doctor says, ‘That is nothing. We can take a lung out of one person, put it in another and have him out looking for work in 4 weeks.’

A British doctor says, ‘In my country, Medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another and have both of them out looking for work in 2 weeks.’

The American doctor, not to be out done, interjected, ‘You guys are way behind. We are about to take a negro with no brains, put him in the White House and then half the country will be out looking for work in one week.
 
Posts: 95 | Location: Pittsburgh | Registered: October 04, 2008Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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potere bianco' this is not funny,, please keep hateful jokes off this thread
 
Posts: 1040 | Location: "" Packed up,,Prayed up,,Looking up"!! | Registered: March 09, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
Old Pro
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We ought to be praying that
p.bianco gets granted a godly
self-steem for himself, and know
who is his Creator!
 
Posts: 1195 | Location: home | Registered: May 20, 2006Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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