Just to lighten things up a bit and get away from politics. I'm the 5th kind



The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex.

This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone, and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.

The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex.
This is when you have been with your partner for a short time, and you are so needy you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.


The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex.
This is when you have been with your partner for a long time.
Your sex has gotten routine, and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.

The 4th kind of sex is
called: Hallway Sex
This is when you have been with your partner for too long.
When you pass each other in the hallway you both say 'screw you.'

The
5th kind of sex is called: Religious Sex.
Which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night. (Very Popular)


The 6th kind is called Courtroom Sex.
This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.

And; Last, but not least,
The 7th kind of sex is called: Social Security Sex.
You get a little each month. But not enough to enjoy yourself.

Sex On The Beach

Outdoors unders the stars at night!

Rodeo Sex can be fun occasionally - that's where you mount the little lady and once you're "snug in the saddle" you call her by a different name .....then try to hold on for as long as you can.

Sunnehanna Golf Course Sex. Fore!! watch out for the sprinklers

quote:

Originally posted by bleyeskaren:
Outdoors unders the stars at night!

With Escapeman don't forget.

quote:

Sex On The Beach Smiler

One word...........SAND

Sex on the beach not good for 69

Walk Softly and Carry A Big Blanket!

quote:

Originally posted by seaworthy:
Walk Softly and Carry A Big Blanket!

a pig in the blanket would be april23 with 2 king size bed sheets tied together and her feet sticking out of the bottom because her shoe size is larger than shaq

quote:

Originally posted by Cereal Killer:

quote:

Originally posted by seaworthy:
Walk Softly and Carry A Big Blanket!

a pig in the blanket would be april23 with 2 king size bed sheets tied together and her feet sticking out of the bottom because her shoe size is larger than shaq

Cereal Killer, it is Sunday .. shock us and be nice one day of the week.

Where's the selection for "having sex as often as you can now cause he's going to Iraq in Feb sex"?

My hubby and I are number 4 ...hallway sex

There should be a catagory for ...try to get it when all the kids are sleeping (and not in your bed), you have time, you're not exhausted from chasing the kids all day

To TryingToMakeIt.
Thank you husband for his service for me. I’ll be sure to bug God about his safety. Some Americans still appreciate that. I take that "Support your troops" bumper sticker on my car very serious. What I am about to say is not to brag at all, but to let you know some of us care. My favorite way is to secretly pick up the checks of all soldiers I see in restaurants anonymously. Secondly, I know 4 ladies at the Tampa post office personally from sending packages to soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan. It’s just amazing what the little things mean. Like a couple of packages of cookies, shampoo, tooth paste etc. or just a letter from home can mean. My grandson is in beautiful down town Baghdad for his 2nd tour. He had a tour of Afghanistan in the middle of the Iraq trips. (Just a personal note for your peace of mind about your husband’s deployment.) A Large percentage of the Iraqis people LOVE Americans. Not at all like the once CNN shows all the time. God Bless him & you for sacrificing his time..

quote:

Originally posted by tryingtomakeit:
Where's the selection for "having sex as often as you can now cause he's going to Iraq in Feb sex"?

Just wanted to wish you luck in the time your hubby is deployed. If you could please tell him he is a HERO. Thank him for his service. If it were not for brave men like him were the hell would this country be? I also have tryed to sent boxes to deployed soldiers that have no family or families who are unable to send care packages to their loved ones. If your husband happens to know of a solider who is in this situation my husband and I would be happy to "adopt" him or her or as many as we can during their deployment. I hope you know how special you are for being so strong in this time.It takes special men to be soldiers but it also takes special women to be military wifes! Our prayers are with your family.