"Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons."

--Anonymous

Dr Bell,
Can you hypothesize on the effects and natural resistance, when Republicons come into contact with Demacrons?

And if so, what about the violently infernal and morally deplorable gas that is created during their extended state of viscocity known as Supreme Neutronic Primaritous?

quote:

Originally posted by leftcoastlooker:
Dr Bell,
Can you hypothesize on the effects and natural resistance, when Republicons come into contact with Demacrons?

And if so, what about the violently infernal and morally deplorable gas that is created during their extended state of viscocity known as Supreme Neutronic Primaritous?

I would imagine that the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics would dominate such circumstances in the first case.

In the second instance, albeit Chaos Theory would obtain, Social Darwinism suggests that despite malodorous permutations the species is more apt to evolve than not... in my opinion.

And your view?

Thank you Dr. Bell,
I would agree that in my studies of Govermentium that growth and mass have always increased over time studies. I found this fascinating when you consider that most all Morons and Peons are on the surface working towards "smaller Governmentium".

Reguardless of the surface view of it's growth potential, there are always Morons becoming Neutrons and causing a chain like reaction in Isodope generation and therefore a relentless and powerful cylcle, producing new Morons and Peons to support the new Mass, resulting in what you have described as "Critical Morass"

I have also found that in cases where it outlives it's intended 2-6 yr. half life, it has destroyed or made it very uninhabitable for any other elements to produce or thrive in various geographic locations around the world.

This of course creates the slag that promotes the element "Administatium" and when ingested creates constipation.

Thank you.

What is the only letter of the alphabet that is not in the periodic table?

Rev. Leftcoast,

Your astute observations are appreciated and, I have found, become pivotal in the pursuit of harmony which, though approached far too languidly in the main, tend to press on apace regardless.

The existence of Governmentium, while having so many beneficial attributes, can at times be perplexing and not at all according to Hoyle's Law of dealing. Nevertheless, it is indespensible and, like a colt, not entirely untrainable to good effect.

Naturally, it is those who cut the grass and man the parts counter, however, upon whom Governmentium depends to further its chain reactions.

Wouldn't you agree?

As for Dr. Newman's query, I am at a temporary loss to reply.

J is the only letter not used in the periodic table.